Of filter kaappi and maakkolams, of pookalams and kaineettams, of madisar and settumundu, of mangaacurry and mysorepak, of books and words, of pens and colours, of steps and rhythm...
To the good at heart, I offer a feast ;
Mess with me, and I'll be a beast :-D
A to Z Series Post # 8 - Homeland Calling..........
I found it difficult to get back to my normal mode of thoughts for some days after that fight with Kamini.
Some things she said that day were still fresh in my mind.
That if I was the affected party on one side, she was equally affected on the other.
That everyone had a reason to do what he did.
She was true when she said that.
She might’ve had her own reasons for everything she ‘d done, but why wasn’t she making me see them, was my question.
Did she have a reason for that too ?
As for being equally affected in our relationship, here she’d chosen to be affected . She could do justice to her status as my wife , if she chose to. Instead, she had chosen to ignore her duties.
Did I say duties ?
Yes, bearing a child was one of her duties, wasn’t it ?
I’d become more polite in our conversation after the fight, and took care not to burst out, even if I felt close to boiling point. Somehow ingrained deep in my heart was the belief that she wasn’t justified at all in what she did, and that our marriage wouldn’t last long.
This fuelled my feelings for Mahita all the more.
I was sure that if my marriage with Kamini ended, Mahita would become my wife. I don’t know why I thought that way, whether I was living in fantasy ,or whether I’d lost my mind; especially when I hadn’t yet conveyed my love for her. I was blind in my faith , when it came to my love and Mahita.
That’s when I had to travel to India on an emergency.
My grandmother fell unconscious in the bathroom, and broke her hip bones. She needed an urgent surgery to set it right.
She was very old, frail and fragile; she’d no courage that she would survive the surgery.
She wanted me to come. Us, rather.
She had brought me up after I lost my mother, and I loved her more than I did myself.
I couldn’t deny her request.
I wasn’t sure how long she’ll be on this earth, and I wanted to gift her with happiness.
“ We’ll have to go, Kamini. I hope you’ll support me in this,” I said, as I rang Cosmos Travels for flight tickets.
She nodded, and later when I went to the bedroom with the printouts of the tickets, she was ready with two suitcases, meticulously packed.
“ Have you got your leave approved ? I don’t want your job to suffer because of this,” I said. I was determined not to let her feel she was doing me a favour.
“ I’ve two months of paid vacation, and around 15 days of overtime”, she said.
“ That’s fine. By the way, I suggest we keep our fights to ourselves. There’s no need to let Dadima know all this. I don’t want her to be sad over this. I don’t know how long she’ll hold on to life,” I spoke, my tone a bit stern this time.
“ I know, Vinod. For God’s sake, I’m here to support you, not to hurt you. Trust me, at least on this. I won’t speak a word against you,” she said, her hurt evident in her voice.
I looked at her for a minute, and loaded the suitcases in our car. I called Arun and made arrangements for taking my car from the airport back to the office parking.